You Are Cordially Uninvited

I don’t doubt that what I see as my own charm, whimsy, and honesty constitute red flags for potential dates. So to any man who emerges from the obstacle course of my single-mom status and “refreshing honesty” about my shortcomings with his eyes still fixed on pursuit, I say, “Bravo, sir – bring it on.”…

The Bliss of Ignorance

I prefer when circumstances align that allow me to be either a written processor or a verbal processor. When I’m struggling with something, I come here and write about it, or I call one of the people in my inner circle, or I do some combination of the two, ultimately arriving at some level of…

Silent Rhythms

If I am a river, You are a tributary, Mingling your waters with mine, Flowing into, amongst, then away, To become a cloud Whose shape reminds me of you. If I am a path, You are a crossroad, Forcing unforeseen choices, Intersecting my progress with pleasure, The geometry of us, Diverging points on a compass…

Can People Change?

If you’ve ever mulled over the question of whether people can change in any significant way, you’ve likely landed somewhere on the yes-no spectrum based on what you’ve experienced in your life and relationships. The unique blend of your personal history will inform your conclusion. I’ve always felt that people are capable of change but…

Single Mom Seeks Unicorn

I liken this blog to a slightly more edited version of my personal journal — it’s raw, confessional, and fiercely honest. One thing I don’t want is for it to ever veer into mommy blog territory, so while you shouldn’t be concerned that this post is a trend in that direction, I do want to…

Be Stone, Not Water

Love yourself enough today to be stone. Damn. If you’ve read through some of my posts, you already know I’ve not always been stalwart. I’ve been amenable. I’ve fallen victim to loneliness and longing, and it’s led me to precisely the point the author cautions me to avoid: the place where I’m water, surrounded by…

Deep Cuts

The original forty wrapped about a month ago, and if you’ve read through even a select smattering of my dating posts, you may have noticed how much I changed from the beginning of My Year to where I am today. Reaching my goal of posting my stories here has me feeling a bit introspective, so…

Forty’s Thoughts on Fifty

I was recently notified that I hit both the 50-posts mark and the 50-followers milestone. Fifty seems like a good place to do some reflecting, so here goes… I am a writer. I have always been a writer. My writing is at once catharsis and egotism, pure creation and a cry for attention, pressure release…

…What She’s Having

I find myself thinking a lot lately about When Harry Met Sally — or rather, about the film’s central question: can men and women be friends without sex getting in the way? I’ve made several friends over the past year or so, most notably The Confidante and The Voyeur (my many years of French classes…

A Different Kind of Ghosting

The ghosts of matches past keep appearing. Fortunately not in my bedroom at midnight, but still. In the past two weeks, I’ve heard from The Scientist, The Hermit, The Leaguer, and The Cop. Full disclosure: The Hermit and I have been exploring the landscape of a text-only friendship for the past five weeks, and it’s…

The Paradox of Pragmatism

Last night, I re-read Jack London’s short story “To Build a Fire,” which seemed an appropriate choice based on last week’s polar vortex. In the story, the narrator quickly identifies the solitary human character’s primary flaw: he lacks imagination. To this man, the extreme cold is an observable fact, a stimuli that requires a response…

Caveat Emptor

Let’s step back in time to when I met The Manager. That Sunday was the last day of my girls trip before heading home to reality and colder temperatures. My flight was in the late afternoon, and The Manager was getting back into town around mid-day. We arranged to meet at a hotel near mine,…